Divorce involving children is always very difficult, especially when they’re quite young. They don’t understand why their parents no longer want to love together and can sometimes blame themselves for the break-up. It’s important to make it clear to your children that they’re not responsible for any relationship breakdown and that both parents still love them.

Equally, supporting your children financially is important too. If the parent with care (PWC), usually the mother, is receiving benefits then the C.S.A. will get involved and demand money from the non resident parent (NRP). However don’t think that all of this money will go towards the children, because it won’t. The job of the C.S.A. isn’t to ensure that money gets to your children, it’s to collect debts on behalf of the government to make up for the benefit they’re paying the mother. Much of that money goes to the government, not your children or their mother.

Therefore you should need to ensure that your children are supported financially, as bringing up children can be very expensive. When they’re of a school age it can be even tougher as their school accessories and uniforms can run into hundreds of pounds per school year. For example, many schools insist on having branded personalised clothes with their school’s name on them, making them more expensive that regular clothes of the same type and colour.

This means a jumper that should cost £5 normally can cost several times that amount. With the C.S.A. keeping most of the money they take from you, you should help out with these costs if at all possible.

Clive Bellmore