Trust is a very important thing in marriage. Both you and your partner should trust each other if the marriage is to succeed. However I’ve been told by a great many friends, both male and female, that sometimes the truth isn’t always the best policy. In fact, as many people have said, so long as nothing has happened it’s best to not rock the boat and the keep quiet.

I’ll give you an example. I went on a boys night out when I was married with some university friends, where we attended a strip club. It was a great night and a lot of fun was had by all. As you can imagine.

Now, when I got home to the loving wife (!) I told her all about our exploits. This, apparently, was where I went wrong. Seems I shouldn’t have mentioned anything about the trip and instead I should have told her that we went to the pub and had a quiet drink.

She kicked off royally. She accused me of trying to sleep with strippers and ogling women, basically anything you could think of. I did point out that weeks earlier she’d seen some male strippers at a hen night, but that was different, apparently?

This whole event caused a major stir and was one of the catalysts for divorce. The moral here, so everyone has since said, is that what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her. Nothing happened at the strip club (well it wouldn’t, if you so much as try anything you get the crap kicked out of you by the seventeen stone bouncers) so I need not have even mentioned it.

My argument to my friends was that I’m honest and I didn’t want to keep anything from her. My stupidity I guess!

Clive Bellmore