Archive for September, 2008

When you get divorced you usually end up dividing things equally, straight down the middle. This applies to the house, the furniture, the money, the car… but oddly not the children? The wife usually gets them. Wonder why that is?

Anyhow, back to splitting things equally, divorce usually ends up in splitting things right down the middle, as this poor chap has had to do with his car.

I personally wish I’d thought of this, I could have split everything down the middle, though I’m not sure it would have worked with the house… would have been fun trying though

It’s drastic, but effective!

Clive Bellmore

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When you’re getting divorced you’ll invariably need a divorce lawyer. Luckily enough I found this picture on the Internet.

Now, is this a clever piece of advertising from a divorce lawyer looking to drum up business from women who are angry at their cheating husbands, or is this a vandalised car from a spurned wife after the aforementioned cheating husband did what cheating husbands do?

Whatever it is, it catches the eye. Though, I don’t think anyone would be able to do the school run in it!

Also, if it is an advert for a divorce lawyer, would you really want to hire a lawyer who drives a yellow Corsa? Clearly they’re not very good to only be able to afford an old hatchback.

Clive Bellmore

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Sometimes it’s good to let your soon to be ex know that you’re divorcing them in the most humorous, public way possible. What could be funnier that announcing it with a billboard?

To be honest, doing this probably didn’t do her any favours in court, but I bet it sure felt good at the time.

Personally, if she has a tape of his indiscretions, it might have been funnier to upload that to YouTube or some such website to humiliate him further. I’m surprised that doesn’t happen more often in fact… come to think of it, that gives me an idea…

I wonder if there are enough angry, jilted spouses out there?

Clive Bellmore

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Many women have suspected this for years, all men are cheats! Now they have evidence to prove it, at least with some men (not all, that was just for effect). Scientists have discovered a cheating ‘divorce gene’ prevalent in some men that makes them more likely to cheat on their partners, and thus end their relationship in divorce.

According to the boffins, the divorce gene is responsible for making the men stay faithful to their partners, or cheat on them, because it releases chemicals into the brain that affect how a man bonds with his wife or girlfriend. Men who have the divorce variant of the gene are more likely to cheat, and are more likely to have had relationship difficulties, according to the scientists.

The research is still in its early stages so it’s unlikely to be used in divorce courts by men to explain away their misdemeanours, nor is it likely to be a question asked by women when they meet a potential husband, but it’s worth keeping an eye on.

Divorce gene indeed… whatever next?

Clive Bellmore

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Getting stressed about your divorce? Spare a thought for Baba Mohammed Bello Abubakar of Nigeria. The 84-year-old man is having to divorce 82 of his 86 wives because he received death threats from religious extremists.

According to him, his marrying more than 4 wives isn’t against anything written in the Koran, but just to be on the safe side he has decided to give up 82 of his wives. I wonder how he chooses which ones to divorce. Maybe an X-Factor style round of auditions where he grades them on all aspects of being a wife?

However he chooses which wives to divorce, he’d better hope there’s no Nigerian version of the CSA because they’d take him to the cleaners for his 170 children.

Obviously he’s angry at having to divorce 82 of his wives, and doesn’t believe it necessary:

I have not contravened any established law that would warrant my being banished from the land… There is no law that says one must not marry more than four wives.

It does make you wonder what his house is like, and more importantly what’s the queue for the bathroom like in the morning?

Clive Bellmore

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