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With the current financial climate the way it is, postponing your divorce until you can afford it seems like a good idea. Many couples are having to put off their divorce and stay together because they simply can’t afford to split up, with the housing market being so depressed.

However new research shows that by staying together, couples who want to divorce are actually increasing their stress levels rather than living amicably.

Divorce financial expert Karen Stewart, she says that by staying together when a relationship is over couples are putting themselves through high levels of stress and anger.

As people stay in relationships that in their own minds have ended. I find that stress and anger escalate. It’s better to nip it in the bud and be prudent.

Think about whether your health will suffer before you decide to stay with your partner instead of divorcing them.

Clive Bellmore

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Actress Reese Witherspoon has spoken out over her divorce from fellow actor Ryan Philippe and described the divorce as being:

Very humiliating and very isolating.

The couple had been married for seven years, and have two children together. They divorced in 2006, and have both met other people since. Reese is now with ‘Broke Back Mountain’ star Jake Gyllenhaal.

Reese revealed her distress about her divorce in next month’s issue of Elle.

When people get in your face and say, ‘This will pass,’ you think: Are they crazy?

I’m never gonna feel any better than I feel right this minute and nothing’s ever gonna make sense again. And I still have moments where I’m like, ‘Nothing’s ever gonna make sense again.’

[But]If it’s not painful, maybe it wasn’t the right decision to marry to begin with. Those are the appropriate emotions.

Clive Bellmore

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Far be it for the government to help families stay together, instead they’ve done the exact opposite. They’ve been rewarding mothers for divorcing their husbands, according to research from Professor Marco Francesconi. He claims that the money the government have dished out in Tax Credits to single mothers makes them financially better off than when they were married, resulting in an increase in the divorce rate among the poorer classes in the UK.

Add to this the fact that the CSA reward parents with care for not allowing access to their children for the non resident parent, and you’re left with a society that tells the mother: divorce your husband and forbid him to see your kids, and you’ll get more money.

Prof Francesconi claims that Gordon Brown’s flagship policy, the Tax Credits scheme, has had the unintentional knock on effect of causes more families to break up.

Well done Gordon!

Clive Bellmore

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Everyone loves a good party, and any old excuse for a shin-dig is usually good enough to get the drinks out, the music on and start drinking like you’re a teenager again. However, most people only tend to celebrate what they perceive to be ‘happy’ occasions, like birthdays, anniversaries and, dare I say it, weddings and engagements.

Isn’t a divorce just as much fun and cause for celebration as a wedding, if not more so? A wedding signifies the end of freedom, whereas a divorce marks someone being released from a custodial sentence. It’s becoming more common now to throw parties to celebrate divorce, in much the same way as people have parties to celebrate being released from prison. You can even by divorce party products such as a divorce cake, which is a wedding cake, but with a humorous twist.

Divorce isn’t a sad time, a time for reflection or a time for self pity. It’s a time to kick back and celebrate the fact that you’ve survived something that clearly wasn’t meant to be while you were young enough to do something about it.

If you’re getting divorce, or have just got divorced, have a divorce party to celebrate, and show your friends just how excited you are to be rid.

Clive Bellmore

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Mickey Rourke finally got his career back on track with his movie ‘The Wrestler’, where he was nominated for an Oscar for best actor at the Academy Awards last weekend. The film was billed as a return to form for Rourke, who had been absent from the movie world for the best part of a decade. The reason for his absence, and descent into drink, was his divorce from wife Carre Otis

Rourke divorced his wife in 1998, after a turbulent 6-year marriage where he was at one point arrested for abusing his wife.

Rourke says it took him until now to get over his divorce.

I still love her. I love her in a different way but I waited for her for eight years (after the divorce) for her to come back. I’ve moved on now. It’s the first time I’ve been able to say that and mean it.

Clive Bellmore

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A man tricked his Thai bride into getting divorced, and is now being hounded by her. Graeme Shore met his Thai bride, Nongyao Yaiprab, in 1995 and brought her back to the UK, marrying her in 1997. Despite living in the UK for over ten years, Nongyao failed to learn the language and didn’t settle. Mr Shore then sent her on a holiday back to Thailand, on her own, before tricking her into signing divorce papers that she couldn’t read.

Paul Masters, the divorce lawyer for Nongyao Yaiprab, stated:

At some point, he told her she looked rather tired and needed a holiday. She agreed that this was a good idea, expecting that they would go together somewhere. Instead, she was given one ticket.

When she came back from Thailand she was met by Shore’s parents, who gave her a document to sign before she could meet her husband.

It was in English and she could not understand what it said. Mr Shore’s parents just told her to sign it, and she did so that she could return to her husband.

Later she discovered her signature had finalised her divorce.

Since the divorce, Nongyao Yaiprab has hounded her ex husband with letters, parcels and phone calls. However he has now met and married someone else, also a Thai bride.

Clive Bellmore

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We all know that divorce is bad for our bank balance, but did you know that divorce is also bad for the planet? No, we don’t mean in a bad Karma sort of way, the truth is that divorced men tend to be more wasteful than married men when it comes to their carbon footprint, at least according to Australian senator Steve Fielding.

Fielding argues that men who get divorced are more wasteful with resources, as they consume more electric, food and of course a second property, than they would if they lived with their wife.

Personally I found that I used far less resources when I got divorced, as I didn’t leave the heating and the lights on, I didn’t buy as much milk and I didn’t drive into town for no reason whatsoever, other than to just ‘look around’.

Clive Bellmore

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We all know that divorce can be costly, especially when there are children involved. If you have kids and you get divorced, your wife could take up to 60% of your wealth.

However, according to a survey conducted on the website OnePoll.com, cheating actually works out more expensive than getting a divorce. The website conducted a survey of 2,000 cheats (how’d they manage to find them and get them to own up?) and fond that they mostly agreed that affairs are very expensive.

For example, cheaters were spending almost £2,000 per year on romantic (yet sordid) weekends away with their part time partner, £1,000 on dinners out and another £1,000 chocolates and flowers.

Incredibly, even 10% of guys who cheat spend money on flowers for their wife on the way home because they feel guilty.

Had any flowers lately ladies?

Clive Bellmore

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If you’re going through a divorce you may wonder where it all went wrong. What exactly happened to cause you and your soon to be ex to drift apart? Often the problem lies with the fact that you’re just two very different people and your personalities don’t mix, quite the opposite in fact, they clash. If you’ve found yourself arguing with your spouse all too regularly, the chances are that you probably should get divorced, if anything for the sanity and health of you both.

It doesn’t always follow though that couples grow apart and end up resenting and arguing with each other, sometimes the relationship is stormy from the outset, and you wonder why you ever got married at all.

My ex-wife for example would rant and rave before we even lived together, blowing up over the smallest thing. Once she grabbed the handbrake of the car I was driving because she didn’t like the way I was driving, causing the car to stop abruptly at a roundabout. This led to an argument which lasted until we got home, and she launched her Nokia 6500 Slide to the floor, shattering the phone on the pavement outside the house.

It’s possible I should have known from that, and other instances like it, that I shouldn’t have married her in the first place.

Clive Bellmore

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In case you weren’t sure, or if you actually care (some people do) Amy Winehouse IS getting divorced from her husband, Blake Fielder-Civil. This doesn’t quite come from the horse’s mouth, more from the horse’s mother’s mouth.

We’re not calling Amy a horse though!

Amy’s mum, Janis, says that even though Amy did want to save their marriage, the fact that Blake his trying to get his hands on half of her reported £15 million fortune has opened her eyes to the fact that she needs to get rid.

Janis states:

The divorce proceedings are still going ahead. Her dad Mitch deals with that side of things.

As for the money, I don’t know what is happening with regards to Blake. All I know is that we have always looked after her finances.

We have a company where all of Amy’s money goes. We’re a family and we make sure we look after one another.

Clive Bellmore

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